Posted by: Brooke Hukill | December 4, 2008

My Holiday Story

The presents, the running from this house to the next because you have to see everyone, the fights over who spent the most time with which side of the families.  Not to mention just working out the logistics, especially if you have the divorced families to deal with.  We have several divorced situations, so sad the way that works out and all the fuss it creates around the holidays.  I have yet to figure out why people can’t put aside their differences and be civil for the sake of their children.  I do it with my ex, but out of 5 divorced situations in my family we are the only ones who deal with this issue on a civil basis.  We don’t necessarily like each other but we work through things in a civil way and we keep our focus on our child.  My parents were divorced and never did this for me and my sister.  Instead it was a fight, one that my mom one every year except for one.  I hate that so much now that my father is gone and I only spent one childhood Christmas with him and only one adult Christmas with him.  My husband also has to deal with this with his ex and oh my Lord talk about a serious production!  That one is always heartbreaking and the kids always get stuck in the middle.  So many men just bow out of their kids life after a divorce, at least for the most part.  They become part-time weekend dads.  That’s just not enough for my wonderful hubby.  He fought for his kids and has them, but again the holidays and time still has to be shared and its never an easy battle.  We finally decided to alternate Thanksgiving each year and what a blessing that has been!  The year that the older 3 kids are at their “part-time” parents is a little hard, but so worth it the next year when I have all 4 of my babies all to myself!  We have even started leaving town for the holidays, just going to the lake house, but it is so relaxing staying in one place with all our kids for the entire day.  It doesn’t exactly set well with my parents yet but they will adjust.  I have to do what I think is best for my kids and this is a calm tradition I will stick to.  We live close to both our parents so its not like the holidays are the only time to see us.

As a child we ran between 5 to 6 houses in a 24 hour span and one of those places was an hour away.  It never seemed weird to me, it’s just what the holidays were and all I ever knew.  Now that I have a family of my own I don’t want my children to be rushed and not get to enjoy their families or their presents.  Doesn’t it seem a little cruel to give kids toys and then 10 minutes later you rip them away and say “sorry, off to the next stop!”?  And why is it that we are expected to pack up our family of 6 and all the things they need to travel on Christmas day?  Wouldn’t it be easier if everyone came to our house?  All of the rest of our extended families only consist of two or three people each.  Okay, so now that I have complained about everything…I just want Christmas to have its meaning back.  People seem to say this every year but when are we going to stand up and say enough is enough?  Well this will be our year!  Maybe not so much out of choice but a push from God I guess.  I will explain that in my next blog…

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Responses

  1. ~sigh~ Not being home for holiday’s totally bums me out, even with all that craziness. I’ve seriously been bah-humbugging it because of it, so I signed up to go volunteer Christmas Day at the homeless shelter in my neighborhood, but I’d still rather be there with you and all my other crazies 🙂

  2. Ah yes, it gets just a lil bit crazy around the Holidays, but it’s getting a little better every year, eh? Sis, we wish you were coming too. Don’t know how we’re going to cope without you here to keep us laughing 🙂


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